You’ve done the work.

You understand yourself.

And still, something in your system hasn’t shifted.

That something is often your attachment conditioning.

Attachment Coaching with Melissa Hower heals attachment conditioning at the root.

Heal your attachment style.

Heal your life.

Serving Boston, Massachusetts, and clients worldwide through secure online sessions.

Schedule a free 30 minute consultation today

Heal Your Attachment Style. Heal Your Life.

Even after all this time, you are still not where you want to be.

You wake in the middle of the night, your body flooded with dread.

Your mind cycles through past mistakes, failed relationships, missed opportunities.

You have done a great deal of work on yourself, including therapy, somatic practices, 12 Step programs, and personal growth. And yet you still feel like you are treading water.

Nothing is actually wrong, but your nervous system will not settle.

You want closeness, yet relationships remain hard.

You struggle to say no, even when you desperately need to.

Even small disappointments can undo you.

And then something different happens.

You pause.

You breathe.

You place a hand over your heart.

Tears rise as you feel the sting of every moment in your past when something like this happened before.

You have worked so hard for so many years, and still moments like this can undo you.

Attachment Coaching with Melissa Hower

Hi, I’m Melissa Hower, an Attachment Coach.

I specialize in working with therapy-savvy, growth-minded adults in Boston, Massachusetts, who understand themselves deeply yet still feel stuck in the same emotional patterns.

You have done the work.

You know the language.

You have explored insight, mindfulness, somatic practices, and personal growth.

You are committed to healing. And still, something in your system has not shifted.

That something is your attachment conditioning.

Attachment develops before language.

It shapes your sense of safety, self-worth, emotional regulation, ability to connect with others, and capacity to explore and take risks. Because attachment develops before we have language, you cannot think or talk it into changing. It must be repaired through experience.

That is exactly what Attachment Coaching using the Ideal Parent Figure Protocol provides.

I know this because I not only see this happen for my clients, but because I’ve experienced it myself.  I was a client before becoming a practitioner. I know what it takes to heal your attachment style. I know the difference that it makes. This is why I do this work.

How Attachment Coaching Works

Attachment coaching uses the Ideal Parent Figure Protocol, an experiential attachment repair method developed by Dr. Dan Brown and colleagues.

Rather than analyzing your past, we work directly with the attachment system to create new internal experiences of secure attachment.

In sessions, you imagine a pair of Ideal Parents who meet your attachment needs consistently and reliably. These Ideal Parents are not real people, and they are not me. They are imagined figures who respond to you exactly as you need.

Through guided imagery and repeated experience, your nervous system begins to internalize a new template for safety, connection, and emotional regulation.

Secure attachment is built through five core experiences:

• Safety and protection


• Soothing and comfort


• Attuned responsiveness


• Delight in who you are


• Encouragement of exploration and autonomy

My role is to guide and scaffold the process so your Ideal Parents provide these experiences in a way that feels deeply attuned to you.

What Changes When Attachment Heals

When insecure attachment shifts toward earned secure attachment, the impact is profound and practical.

You may notice that:

• Your emotional reactions feel more proportionate and easier to recover from


• Relationships feel safer and more satisfying


• Boundaries feel clearer and less loaded


• You can take care without bracing


• Disappointment no longer collapses you


• Joy feels accessible without fear

You stop feeling broken and start feeling like yourself, the self you were always meant to be.

Working Together

All sessions are held virtually through Zoom. Attachment coaching translates beautifully to online work, and many clients find it easier to settle into their nervous system in their own space.

If you are ready to get off the healing hamster wheel and address your most persistent struggles at their root, I invite you to schedule a free 30-minute consultation.

This conversation provides an opportunity to ask questions, understand how the Ideal Parent Figure Protocol works, and determine whether this approach is a good fit for you.

Schedule your free consultation here.

Now what?

If you are ready to get off the healing hamster wheel and finally resolve your most challenging issues once and for all at their root, we should talk.

Click here to schedule a free, 30-minute consultation to find out how this modality works and the individualized approach we’ll use to get you earned secure. I look forward to speaking with you!